Burn, Baby, Burn by Michael Seale (Chapter 28)

 Chapter 28

Blinded by the Light

 Dr. Connor arrived at her office the next morning, surprised that I was sitting on the step in front of her door. I hadn’t slept. I’m sure I looked as shitty as I felt.

 “Mr. Davis, what are you doing here?” she asked. 

 “I’m really sorry, Dr. Connor. You said I should call if anything happened.”

 “Yes, I did. Why didn’t you call?”

 “I can’t. I couldn’t plug the phone back in.” I said, almost sobbing. “Please, I need to talk to you.”

 “Mr. Davis, I have appointments all day. I have a few minutes before the first one comes, if you want to talk now.”

 “Yes, yes, that would be great.”

 She unlocked the door to her office, and I sat in the waiting area, while she got herself ready. The waiting room looked unfamiliar. Maybe the lights were different, I thought. The room shook. Something wasn’t right it was off kilter. I felt as if the floor was moving under me. The darkness was coming again. I tried to call out to Dr. Connor. No words escaped my lips. I held onto the armrest. The room spun and turned black. I felt as if I was falling. The darkness was complete.

***

 That fucking bitch witch doctor, what the fuck does she know, he thought. He pushed Mike in to the abyss. I won’t let him ruin this for me. I am in control; he thought. The pussy didn’t even put up a fight. At least the old man fought me before I forced him out. 

 “Mr. Davis, you can come in now.” Dr. Connor called from her office door.

 “That’s ok,” he said with a smile. “I’ve got it covered now. I was out of it before.” 

 He stared at her with his nearly black eyes. He didn’t blink. She stared back as if seeing him. But that couldn’t be. No one saw him. He was nothing; he wasn’t there. 

 “Are you sure, just a minute ago, it sounded like you really wanted to tell me something?”

 “You know what I did, but now I think I can handle things on my own, I think I just got rid of my last problem.”

 He stood up with a smile and walked out of the office. 

 The rain couldn’t damper his mood. He was in the light; no longer must he wait in the dark corner for his turn. He had taken the control and now he was Mike or at least that is what everyone will believe, he thought. He would have to be Mike for the rest, so he could fulfill his calling. Cleanse the world. 

 Mike’s father, his father, had taught him so much about pain, about humiliation, but also about cleansing the world of sin. He learned it all. God is a vengeful god, and he was the messenger. The Old Testament was clear, God punished sinners, and the world has been sinning far too long. He smiled at the thought. It made him happy to know that he would fulfill his duty now. 

 He had dutifully listened to his father; his father would preach during the week about the sins of the world. He would hang on every word. He absorbed it, his hell, brimstone and fire sermons he doled out on the family day after day. Then on Saturday it was his turn to pay for the sins. It didn’t matter if they were his to bear or not, he would pay. His father would start by making cut a switch down from the shrub next to our house. He would make the boy sit and take every leaf off, every offshoot, to drag the punishment out. The old man would then make him strip to his underwear in the yard and whip him with the switch. Red welts and stripes would instantly appear. 

 If he cried out or sobbed, it would be worse. His father would beat him until he was out of breath. He would then force the boy to get dressed and sit with him. He would tell his son how much of a worthless sinner he was. How he disappointed him and God. How he only beats because that is what God says to do to the sinners. And if he hadn’t sinned so much, he wouldn’t have to beat him. This all may have hurt Mike, but it only fueled him. He knew that they had appointed him, no anointed him by God to deliver salvation to the world. He knew that God wanted him to cleanse the surrounding others, to baptize them in the blood. His sin was that he enjoyed it all; it gave him more pleasure than any fucking bitch could. 

 The rain poured down on him, soaked him through. He smiled into the overcast skies above.

 “Thank you, Lord. I am your servant.” He called out as he stood in the rain.